To the Current Occupant of my belly,
You are to leave immediately. The residence in which you are living in can not take any more abuse. Your constant parties in the middle of the night has disturbed many of your neighbors, not to mention your landlord. In addition, the constant harassment of your neighboring organ, "the bladder" has gone to far.
You are to pack up you placenta, amniotic bag and any other items you may have and leave the premises immediately. Failure to do so may result in your eviction by the medical team known as "inducement, Pitocin and/or C-section." I have heard all three are rough to deal with and it would be much easier to turn your self in and leave on your own.
Any questions or concerns can be brought up to the owner of the premises, your mother, and must be done in person. I hope you enjoyed your stay these last 9 months and I know the the outside world will be a much better fit for you.
Sincerly Yours,
Your Mommy.
This post made me chuckle. I still think Monday, September 27th would be awesome! Come on, Gibby. We're all waiting for you. Lots of love to you three.
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